miko2 | (no subject)

Today's Song: Black Wind, Fire and Steel by Manowar

I've been wanting to own a Manowar cd for a few years now... not because I thought I'd like them, but just because they are often cited as the cheesiest metal band on the planet (I googled "cheesiest metal band" and got a lot of other suggestions however -- Ratt, Twisted Sister, Quiet Riot, Stryper, Poison, Warrant, Scorpions, etc. However I also got a lot of Manowar hits -- one person even described Dimmu Borgir as "The cheesiest metal band ever besides Manowar", which shows that the cheesiness of Manowar is an accepted fact in some metal circles).

Manowar confine their writing to a few topics: fantasy warriors, "true" heavy metal (as in, they are the defenders of "true" heavy metal and anyone they don't like is "fake" heavy metal), and of course sex. Imagine a bunch of Conan-the-barbarian wannabes playing 80's-influenced heavy metal and you should be able to figure this band out. You know, the Boris Vallejo style Conan, with naked women grovelling at his feet -- that's how the guys in Manowar envision themselves.

(Well... okay, that link is to the Boris Vallejo John Carter of Mars, actually... same difference. ^_^ I might have easily said, "the Boris Vallejo Tarzan" or "the Boris Vallejo hero from the Gor books who's name I couldn't possibly be bothered to remember". Or I could have said, "the Frank Frazetta Conan/John Carter/Tarzan/Gor idiot". It's all the same.)

I also saw someone describe one of their album covers as "Kiss-meets-the Village-People-on Steroids". Lol. ^_^

Anyway if there's one thing you can admire about this band, it's that they aren't following any trends and don't care what anyone else thinks about them. For years they released their music on their own label, and they've stayed true to their power metal roots no matter how unfashionable it might seem. Many fans say, "If you take them seriously then you don't really get it," but frankly, the band seems to take themselves quite seriously. They are nearly a caricature of a metal band, except they are not parodying anything.

Oh, and may I add that their Wikipedia entry was apparently written by their publicist. It includes many gems of completely unbiased journalism, such as "Not since the Vikings invaded Northeast England in 878 had the Isles seen such all-consuming power. The whole of Europe fell prey to Manowar..." and "Throughout their legendary career, the members of MANOWAR have not only overcome each and every obstacle lain in their paths, they have consistently been innovators."

Uh... yeah.

As they sing in Warriors of the World:

we alone are fighting
for metal that is true
we own the right to live the fight
we're here for all of you
Now swear the blood upon your Steel
will never dry
stand and fight together
beneath the battle sky

Spinal Tap could hardly put it better. ^_^ In fact, some people refer to Manowar as a "real life" Spinal Tap. Now that's a ringing endorsement!

Anyway, I picked up Fighting the World at Half Price Books on Monday, so now my quest is complete. I own a slab of Manowar, I have no need for any more. ^_^ Honestly, I own a lot of cds that are less listen-able than this one... just few that are cheesier (but I do own Stryper's To Hell With the Devil...). My song of the day comes from this cd:

Manowar - Black Wind, Fire and Steel (this is an air-guitar video by some goofy idiots -- possibly better than anything Manowar could have come up with however!)

Manowar - Swords in the Wind (Lord of the Rings video footage)
Manowar - Call to Arms (another Lord of the Rings video -- yeah okay, we get the fantasy warrior / LOTR connection already. But really, wouldn't you prefer Lord of the Rings set to... oh, I don't know, Nightwish perhaps? )